Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Haven't gotten out of bed all day

Despondent as shit. Scribbling to plaster, looking away, looking back, scribbling more. I don't know how he does it.

I'm supposed to receive the package in the mail Sunday.With the journals and stuff.

I can't believe how you guys are being to Robert. His cycle will never end. Hes in the Snake pit now, and you guys want him to stay there as a sign he will "never break?" he broke once, you fools. He'll break again, and again, and again.  Unless you could somehow kill Slenderman. But I don't think any of you are capable. Not with science, not with Magic, not with story. I don't think he'll stop, ever.

Killing a few proxys as a sign of resistance? thats not even worth mentioning. That's like killing zombies, or the Russians burning their own fields when they got invaded. The mere fact there are zombies isnt the problem here. The source is the issue. Killing proxies is barely worth talking about. I abhor killing. I understand your need to kill in self-defense, but killing proxies does not a badass make.

I looked back at my first post today. HA. That kid, that little boy who posted the first time. Who did he think he was? An idealist who thought he could be a Hero. HA.

I'm not in as deep of shit as half of you, and I already feel  broken.

Plaster has been a godsend the last 24 hours. He understands my feelings, even when he disagrees.

I sound like a crazy person and a bitchy manchild so I'm going to stop now.


  1. How can you just give up hope that quickly?

  2. I'm sorry. My despondancy is making me say foolish things.

    I'm contantly reminded you, I, we, can't beat him. I mean hell I don't even see him yet, but the way things are going...

    I'm not prepared. I'm not ready. Its hitting me so hard.

  3. Good to see that you two get along with each other. Feels relieving. Please don't isolate yourself too much. Even if you can't trust real life friends, at least find a funny chatroom or a joke website to lift your spirits a little.

  4. Shut up, I agree with Slice.

    I don't think the problem will ever stop.
    BUT, Slice, and I say this with love, don't be a bitch. You kept me from giving up, I'm gonna do the same.

    I never wanted to kill them, and I know I'm losing it. I know that it will never be the same now, but you know what?

    Doing that got me here, and I met you people. You crazy bunch of fucked up loons that make me seem less insane.

    THAT'S why I'm fighting. I can't tell you why to fight whatever battles you have, to tell you not to give up, but if you go down because you FEEL bad? You're worse then I am.

    Although, reverse psychology aside, you're right about Robert. That's all I can say about that.

    I'll be around if you want to talk.


  5. I still trust my RL friends

    Its you guys I can't trust

    But I can't talk to anyone else about whats happening

    Im gonna go smoke later I need it